My Spouse: Friend or Fiend


SERIES: F-7 Marriage


Song of Songs 5:16 NIV

16 His mouth is sweetness itself; he is altogether lovely. This is my lover, this my friend, O daughters of Jerusalem.


Song of Songs 7:1-13 GNV

1 What a magnificent young woman you are! How beautiful are your feet in sandals. The curve of your thighs is like the work of an artist.

2 A bowl is there, that never runs out of spiced wine. A sheaf of wheat is there, surrounded by lilies.

3 Your breasts are like twin deer, like two gazelles.

4 Your neck is like a tower of ivory. Your eyes are like the pools in the city of Heshbon, near the gate of that great city. Your nose is as lovely as the tower of Lebanon that stands guard at Damascus.

5 Your head is held high like Mount Carmel. Your braided hair shines like the finest satin; its beauty could hold a king captive.

6 How pretty you are, how beautiful; how complete the delights of your love.

7 You are as graceful as a palm tree, and your breasts are clusters of dates.

8 I will climb the palm tree and pick its fruit. To me your breasts are like bunches of grapes, your breath like the fragrance of apples,

9 and your mouth like the finest wine. Then let the wine flow straight to my lover, flowing over his lips and teeth.

10 I belong to my lover, and he desires me.

11 Come, darling, let’s go out to the countryside and spend the night in the villages.

12 We will get up early and look at the vines to see whether they’ve started to grow, whether the blossoms are opening and the pomegranate trees are in bloom. There I will give you my love.

13 You can smell the scent of mandrakes, and all the pleasant fruits are near our door. Darling, I have kept for you the old delights and the new.


If your marriage is to be enduring, your spouse must be ENDEARING.


In order to have a successful marriage, you must not only LOVE each other, you must LIKE each other.




Ecclesiastes 9:7-9 MOFF – 7 Come, eat your food with joy and drink your wine with a glad heart, for to do 8 this has God’s approval. Wear white robes always, and spare 9 not oil for your head; enjoy like with the woman who you love, through all the fleeting life which God has given you in this world, for this is what you are meant to get out of your life of toil under the sun.



Couples that PLAY together stay together.




1 Corinthians 7:3 GNV – A man should fulfill his duty as a husband, and a woman should fulfill her duty as a wife, and each should satisfy the other’s needs.


It only takes one spouse to be FRIENDLY. It takes both to be FRIENDS.


1 Peter 3:7 GNV – In the same way you husbands must live with your wives with the proper understanding that they are more delicate than you. Treat them with respect, because they also will receive, together with you, God’s gift of life. Do this so that nothing will interfere with your prayers.


Many husbands want to SOLVE what their wives want to SOOTHE Listening is not about hearing words but listening to the MESSAGE behind the words.







Levels of communication:







I Thessalonians 5:11 GNV – And so encourage one another and help one another, just as you are now doing.




1 Corinthians 13:5 LBT – never haughty or selfish or rude. Love does not demand its own way. It is not irritable or touchy. It does not hold grudges and will hardly even notice when others do it wrong.





Commitment means being willing to be UNHAPPY for a while until you WORK things out.


Most couples break-up because of incompatibility His INCOME Her PATIBILITY


Marriage is what you are COMMITTED to making it.

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